c. 1989 L. Greye
- I believe in God, that He (not that I think God has a gender, but this is
what I've been taught to call Him) created us each for a purpose, and that
He gave us free will to determine that purpose for ourselves. I don't believe
God is concerned with our sexual identities. I also believe being gay is not
a choice, though some may choose to deny their sexuality (as I did for
many years). I've known women who knew they were gay from early
childhood and never tried to deny those feelings. I've also known women
who lived their lives for many years as heterosexuals before realizing their
true sexuality.
I started out oblivious, assuming I was straight as would most
people. When I fell in love with another woman, I told myself it was a
phase, at first, but then I began to accept my sexuality as a lesbian. Then,
I decided to try and please my family and my straight friends by switching
horses, as it were. I had a few fairly good relationships with men and even
was engaged for a while. Then I realized that I was allowing men to treat
me like an object and that I deserved respect, in the very least. I didn't
think I could go back to being a lesbian, and I didn't want to be straight
anymore, either. So...I spent about eight years on my own, learning who I
was and why I was and figuring out, in the end, that I could only be happy
if I was true to my heart.
I used to believe that sexuality was a choice, even if it was a clearer
and easier choice for some. Now, I understand that it is honesty that is the
choice...and love. We must choose to be honest with ourselves and others,
and then we must choose to love.
Free will is a precious gift, given to each of us without prejudice.
What we do with that gift is entirely up to us.
- Difference
The differences between us
are neither wrong nor bad;
They stem from what we’ve learned,
the experiences we’ve had.
We’ve made our own decisions
based on insights we acquired
Through triumph and adversity
and lessons these inspired.
The differences between us
can only be for good;
They emphasize diversity,
each value understood—
As colors of a spectrum,
each blending with the next,
Though diminishing in contrast,
still valid in context.
The differences between us
are both clear and hard to see,
For neither lack nor excess
precludes that they agree.
Our balance like a melody,
each note a complement—
To love in flawless harmony,
to be where we are meant.
15Aug2005
